There are two definitions of “constant”
Occurring continuously over a period of time
A situation or state of affairs that does not change
From the original Latin, it comes from the word “constare” which means “stand”, and translates “staying resolute, or faithful”.
Can you see where I am going with this already? Since I am talking to the men here, let me address your headship. Wow, did I need to go there with you? Uh huh.
Let’s take a look at the example of headship that men are given through Christ.
Hebrews 13:8 says ” Jesus Christ is the same, yesterday, today, and forever. ”
No wonder so many women fell in love with Jesus and followed him when He was here on earth! Everything about Him is constant, and it still is now that He is the resurrected King.
God’s protection of women is so evident throughout the Bible. He allowed divorce during the time of Moses because husbands were rejecting and not treating their wives well. Jesus tells men in the New Testament that even when a man looks at another woman with lust in his heart he has already committed ADULTERY. Jesus was not just picking on men here, He was, and is, protecting women.
Women are the sensitive, faith filled, and emotional facet of the coupling relationship. We are like Holy Spirit. We carry much of His same attributes. Holy Spirit is also faithful, sensitive, sparks emotion in His presence, and leads with compassion, truth, and reverence. Women are the glue that hold families together and our part in relationship guides with a special type of wisdom. Even in the Bible wisdom is referred to “as a woman” or in the female context.
Men are designed to lead in headship as God the Father and God the Son. I am by no means dividing the Godhead between men and women, so please do not take it that way. We all have every part of the Godhead when we are in Christ. I am speaking about the nature of the parts of the Godhead and a man’s responsibility to a woman in relationship. A man/husband has been instructed to lead in the relationship. The order is God, husband, wife, children. This does not mean that each individual does not have their own relationship with God. I am speaking of “order”. God is a God of divine order. He likes it that way and when we follow His lead it works out pretty darned good!
Getting Back To Being a Constant
So, men, let me “go there” with you. I hope I have not lost your attention because this is very important. YOUR woman needs to know you are there for her, always. She needs a constant in her life; a representative of God’s faithfulness in headship. She needs to know she is protected, covered, loved, and appreciated. You have the divine opportunity to show your woman that you are faithful as God is, and you will stand with her. NO MATTER WHAT.
This means placing your relationship with her FIRST before anyone else. After all, in marriage we promise this to each other. It means being continual, and to stand unmoved when it comes to your love for her, and your protection. It also means to make sure she knows that she has a forever partner in you. We know you are not perfect. No one is perfect, but when you stand “in Christ”, He gives you what you need to “stand” for your woman as well.
Bottom line: We need a Christ following example of a husband on this earth who will guard our hearts as much as Jesus wants them guarded. We need to know you have our back and that your love for us is everlasting, all the way too physical death. Headship does not mean “Lord over”. The word headship means:
The position of a leader or chief.
Yep, God chose you to lead as Jesus leads. When Jesus addressed His disciples to take a trip to the other side of the waters, His words were “Let us go over…”. Notice, there is no demand there.
Jeremiah 31:3 “The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.”
You see, this is the “nature” of God. He draws us toward Him with His love and kindness. There is no demand there, only guidance and protection. He also has everlasting love. His kindness is unfailing. Now, I know that as people we can fail, but in humility a man can pull off having unfailing kindness. If you really want your woman to respond to you with willingness, compassion, faith, grace, love, and acceptance, then this is the kind of headship to work toward giving her. Bottom line, be Godly good to her!
With All Reverence,
Pastor Jenine Marie Howry